for my unit

{hay, saying goodbye is so hard. this is the video i gave to my unitmates in aclc.}

vocprom spoof (magbalik)

{hey guys, wala akong magawa the other day so i spoof this terrific
mtv and made it into a vocprom ad. enjoy!}

regency assignments

{it was announced last friday that i will be assigned in ateneo de iloilo. here are the other assignments of my batchmates (+2)}

ash wednesday and lent

{Many people are asking me about ash wednesday and the season of lent so i decided to post this one from our Jesuit Ordo. Hope this helps. May you have a meaningful and Christ-centered Lenten season this year.}

Traditionally, the ashes for the Ash Wednesday service come from burning the palm fronds from the previous year’s Palm Sunday celebration. They are made by burning palm fronds which have been saved from the previous year's Palm Sunday, the Sunday before the Easter. They are then blessed by a priest.

Ashes are a biblical symbol of mourning and penance. In Bible times the custom was to fast, wear sackcloth, sit in dust and ashes, and put dust and ashes on one's head.Blessed ashes having been used in God's rituals since the time of Moses (Numbers 19:9-10, 17).

They also symbolize death and so remind us of our mortality. Thus when the priest uses his thumb to sign one of the faithful with the ashes, he says, "Remember, man, that thou art dust and unto dust thou shalt return,"

Getting self-ashed:
Of course, it is easier to purchase them from a religious supply house. However, if you burn the palm fronds yourself, don’t add any other ingredient—just burn the ashes plain. Add a little oil to the ashes so that they will stick to people’s foreheads.
Don’t overestimate how much you need! It is amazing how far a small amount of ashes will go!

Lent is a preparation for the celebration of Easter. For the Lenten liturgy disposes both catechumens and the faithful to celebrate the paschal mystery: catechumens, through the stages of Christian initiation; the faithful, through reminders of their own baptism and through penitential services.

Some Notes on the Lenten Season
(lifted from the Jesuit Ordo of the Philippine Province)

1. The Sundays of Lent are so important that not even a solemnity can take their place. Solemnities occurring on these Sundays are observed on the Saturday preceding.

2. The weeks of Lent from Ash Wednesday to the Saturday before Palm Sunday take precedence over the memorials of saints, which may be celebrated only according to the norms established by liturgical statutes.

3. The Alleluia is always omitted where it is found in the Liturgy of the Hours and in the celebration of the Mass.

4. The Te Deum and the Gloria are suppressed except on solemnities and feasts, and also on festive occasions.

5. In the Office: the antiphon at the Invitatory, hymn at the Office of Readings, Morning Prayer and Evening Prayer, and the antiphon at Daytime Prayer and Night Prayer are found the proper of this Season.

6. Flowers and decorations at the altar are prohibited; the organ and other musical instruments may be used only to accompany the singing, except on Laetare Sunday (4th Sunday of Lent) and during solemnities and feasts.

7. Catholics are obliged to fast on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday and are to abstain from meat on Ash Wednesday, Good Friday and all the Fridays of Lent. We are also reminded, as stipulated in the Code of Canon Law, that there are other works and means of doing penance: prayer, acts of self-denial, almsgiving and works of personal charity. Attending Mass daily or several times a week, praying the rosary, making the way of the cross, teaching the illiterate to read, reading to the blind, helping at a soup kitchen, visiting the sick and shut-ins and giving an overworked mother a break by baby-sitting—all of these can be even more meaningful and demanding than simply abstaining from meat on Friday.

bakit po?

{this is one of the video i made for my group in social marketing class project. this video has been broadcast thru the dream cable. enjoy.}

the parable of the prodigal son

{this is a homily i gave for my community years ago. :) but since its valentines day, i would like to share this because it speaks so much about this deep love which we suppose to celebrate today.}

26 February 2005, JP
by Arthur W. Nebrao, Jr., SJ
2^nd Week of Lent (Year A)

The Parable of the Prodigal Son

Magandang umaga mga kapatid. Nais kong simulan ang aking munting pagbabahagi sa umagang ito, sa isang matamis na tanong; isang tanong na marahil magbubukas ng mga magaganda at mapapait na alaala sa atin mga buhay -- umibig na ba kayo? In English, have you been in love? Marahil lahat sa atin’y sasagot ng “Oo”. Oo, umibig ako. Oo, nagkasabay ang araw at buwan sa iisang langit. Oo, nagkaroon ako ng sinta. Di ba’t kay saya umibig? Di ba’t kay sakit rin mabigo? At kapag pinag-uusapan tungol sa pag-ibig at pagkabigo, isang kwento ang naiisip ko. Ito ang kwento ni Cyrano de Bergerac. Hayaan ninyo ako sariwain sa inyo ang dula nina Cyrano, Roxanne, at Christian.

Isang magaling na mang-espada at makata si Cyrano. Hinahanga siya ng maraming tao. Ngunit, may problema. Mahabang-mahaba ang ilong ni Cyrano. Kung nasa paligid si Cyrano, hindi pinag-uusapan ang kanyang ilong. Kapag mayroon magbigay ng puna tungkol sa ilong ni Cyrano, siguradong uuwi nito nang bugbog sarado. Iisa lang ang iniibig ni Cyrano at ito’y si Roxanne. Ngunit si Roxanne’y iniibig si Christian, ang isang kawal na kasama ni Cyrano. Iniibig rin ni Christian si Roxanne, ngunit meron rin isang problema. Hindi magaling magsalita at magsulat si Christian. Kaya’t tinulungan ni Cyrano si Christian sa pamamagitan ng pagsusulat ng mga matatamis na salita para kay Roxanne. Mayroong nga isang eksena sa dula kung saan si Cyrano ang nagtatalumpati sa dilim na inaakala ni Roxanne ang mga matatamis na salita ay galing kay Christian. Ngunit hindi. Ang lahat ng damdamin ay hindi galing sa salita ngunit sa puso ni Cyrano. Dahil sa tulong ni Cyrano, nagpakasal si Roxanne kay Christian. Hindi nakapag-honeymoon yung dalawa dahil nagkaroon ng isang giyera. Ngunit, hindi ito hadlang sa paghihiwatig ni Cyrano ang kanyang pagmamahal kay Roxanne. Araw-araw pa rin ang sulat ni Cyrano kay Roxanne na inaakala ni Roxanne ay galing kay Christian. Sa kahulihulian ng dula, namatay si Christian at pagkalipas ng labing-dalawang taon, bago namatay si Cyrano, nalaman ni Roxanne ang katotohanan.

Bakit ko sinalaysay ang isang masakit at bigo na kwento sa mga Heswita tulad natin? Sinalaysay ko ang kwento ni Cyrano dahil ito ay kwento rin ng ating Ebanghelyo ngayon sa araw na ito. Sino ba ang hindi pa narinig ang kwento ng Prodigal Son? Siguro lahat tayo ay mayroong malalim na karanasan sa pagdarasal sa kwentong ito noong ginagawa natin ang Banal na Pagsasanay. Ngunit gusto ko pang magdagdag ng isa pang punto para sa atin pagninilay. At ito ang pagtitiis bilang tunay na pag-ibig. Sa kwento ng alibughang anak, maaari natin tingnan ang pagtitiis ng tatlo: ang pagtitiis ng masunuring na anak, ang pagtitiis ng alibughang anak, at ang pagtitiis ng ama.

Ang pagtitiis ng masunuring na anak ay isang mabuti at ideal na halimbawa. Hindi siya nag-rereklamo. Hindi siya naghahanap ng kapalit. Hindi siya umaasa. Lahat ng ginagawa niya ay dahil sa pagmamahal niya sa kanyang ama. Ang pagtitiis naman ng alibughang anak ay tunay na tunay. Siya’y nagbigay sa kanyang kahinahan. Siya’y tumangap ng kanyang kapalaran. Siya’y bumalik sa kanyang pamilya. Lahat ng ito ay dahil sa kanyang pagmamahal sa kanyang ama. At ang pagtitiis ng ama ay walang katulad-tulad. Ang pagtitiis ng ama ay ang pagtitiis ng dalawang anak dahil naintindihan niya ang kanilang dinadaan. At kahit sino pa sila, masunurin o alibugha, mahal na mahal niya sila. At ito ang pagmamahal ng ating Diyos sa atin. Kaya niyang tiisin ang lahat para sa atin.

Nakakatuwa rin itong si Roxanne. Sa kwento, makikita natin na gusto ni Roxanne ang gwapo, elegante, matapang na lalaki para sa kanya. Kapag ang lahat ng mga babae ay katulad ni Roxanne, lahat ng mga lalaki ay mag-papari. Ngunit, hindi niya nakikita na ang tunay na kagandahan ay nasa loob. At ito ang ama sa kwento ng alibughang anak. Ito ang Diyos natin. Handa siyang yumakap sa atin, kahit gaano tayo kabaho, kahit ano pa ang ginawa nating karumaldumal, kahit sino pa man tayo, nakabukas palagi ang kanyang pinto para sa atin.

Ang pagmamahal ni Cyrano ay isang malalim na pagmamahal. Tiniis niyang makita nagsasama sina Roxanne at Christian. Tiniis niyang marinig ang puri ni Roxanne kay Christian, na sa katotohanan kay Cyrano ang pagpupuri. Tiniis niyang sumama sa giyera at nag-alaga ng kanyang karibal. Tiniiis niya hindi ibunyag ang kanyang tunay na damdamin hanggang sa kahulihulian. Tiniis niya ang lahat-lahat. At sa pagtitiis na ito, nakita niya ang tunay na kaligayahan, ang kaligayahan ng pagbibigay ng sarili sa iba.

Sana sa panahon ng kwaresma, ibigay natin ang atin sarili sa pagtitiis, tulad sa pagtitiis ni Kristo para sa atin. At sana sa pagtitiis na ito ay hindi karihapan ang atin mararanas kundi tunay na pagmamahal. Di ba't kay saya umibig? Di ba't kay sakit rin mabigo? Ngunit sa kahulihulian, sana mayabang natin sabihin, "Oo, oo, umibig ako!"

signs

{Homily for tomorrow, 12 February 2007}

Mark 8: 11-13
"The Pharisees came forward and began to argue with Jesus, seeking from him a sign from heaven to test him. He sighed from the depth of his spirit and said, “Why does this generation seek a sign? Amen, I say to you, no sign will be given to this generation.” Then he left them, got into the boat again, and went off to the other shore."

Good morning. Perhaps for most of us, in some point in our lives, we ask for signs. We ask for a sign if we are accepted or loved. We ask for a sign if what we will do is right or wrong. We ask for a sign to know where we will be assigned for regency or summer apostolate. We ask for a sign whether this vocation is really for us. Maybe asking signs is indeed part of our human living – the need to be affirmed and to be sure of things.

In the Gospel for today, we heard that the Pharisees were also seeking for a sign from Jesus to prove that He is indeed the Son of God. On one hand, I guess this was natural for the Pharisees. Who could blame them for asking? I am sure that for some of us here, who underwent the Pilgrimage during our Novitiate, have also experienced the similar experience of asking signs by the people we seek assistance during the long journey. On the other hand, I guess that the Pharisees’ eyes were not really looking beyond. Instead, they wanted the concrete and the real. And this is very true in our secular world where the presence of God is so hard to see and feel because of the different noise and chaos that is happening all around.

Jesus is the sign. Jesus gave them no sign except himself and the ultimate proof of his divinity when he rose from the dead. Today Lord reveals himself to us in many ways -- in his word and in the "breaking of the bread" in the Eucharist, in his Church -- the body of Christ, in his creation, and even in the everyday circumstances of our lives. He reveals himself in people, in friends, and even in enemies. If we seek the Lord, we can be confident that he will give us everything we need to do his will. Most of all the Lord assures us of his presence and the promise that he will never leave us. How sad it is to hear that other people loose faith because they haven’t seen signs of hope.

I would like to end with the prayer of Theresa of Avila which speaks about the important signs that we must be searching. Let nothing disturb you, let nothing frighten you; All things pass: God never changes. Patience achieves all it strives for. Whoever has God lacks nothing, God alone suffices. Is God enough for you?

a tribute for pia

{this is a tribute video for pia who will be leaving for zambia for her vso service. miss you mama p!}

aclc and kim nominated for coa awards

{just got word, i am so happy for aclc and kim for having been nominated for the coa awards this year. win or loose, nomination is a wonderful grace from GOD.}

To: coaawards07@yahoogroups.com, coa0607@yahoogroups.com
CC: mdelossantos@ateneo.edu
From: Jo Pua
Date: Sun, 28 Jan 2007 02:38:29 -0800 (PST)
Subject: [coa0607] COA AWARDS 2007 FINALISTS

Hi everyone,

On behalf of the Council of Organizations of the Ateneo and the COA Awards team 2007, I am pleased to announce the finalists for COA Awards 2007.

We would like to thank all the organizations who had participated in this activity. We know that there were a number of requirements which were asked from you. hehe :) Thanks again for submitting your entries. The COA EB had a difficult (and long) time judging all the entries. The organizations that participated really exerted all their efforts in completing their application forms and in getting recommendation letters. However, as in any awards program, we had to trim down and screen the applicants.

Here are the Top 5 finalists for the COA Organization of the Year (in Alphabetical order):
Ateneo Celadon (Celadon)
Ateneo Christian Life Community (ACLC)
Ateneo Management Association (AMA)
Ateneo Mathematics Society (AMS)
Company of Ateneo Dancers (CADS)

Here are the Top 7 finalists for the COA Leader of the Year (in Alphabetical Order):
Nill Arroyo (AJMA)
Christian Canlas (AMS)
Michael Chong (MEA)
Kim Ko (ACLC)
Frederic Lipio (Kaingin)
Diane Tan (AMA)
Daphne Uy (Celadon)

Congratulations to all the finalists! We would also like to congratulate and thank all organizations who submitted entries for the COA Org of the Year including: Ateneo LEX, Ateneo Management Engineering Association, Gabay, Kythe, Ateneo Junior Marketing Association, Management Economics Organization, Ateneo Special Education (Speed), Ateneo College Glee Club, Kaingin.

We would also like to ask all the nominees to sign up for an interview schedule. A sign up sheet will be posted in the COA Room by 1 PM tomorrow (January 29, 2006). For presidents of the nominated orgs for the Org of the Year Category, you are required to bring with you two officers (could be current or incoming) for the interview. A total of Three officers and three members per org will be interviewed for the Org of the Year Category. In addition, we will be sending an SMS to you (the president) about the names of the members that we have randomly selected for the interview based on the list that you have provided us. Please inform them (the three members and the two other officers) about the interview slot that you have chosen. First come first serve for the interview slots.

Nominees of the Leader of the Year are also required to schedule an interview with the COA EB (solo lang). Same sign up sheet also at the COA Room:)

For the sake of consistency and fairness, all interviews will be conducted on Saturday FEBRUARY 3 from 1230 PM to 5 PM at SOM 211. We cannot conduct interviews outside that period. The reason for this is because we want to have the same set of interviewers for all organizations in order to be as fair as possible. In addition, the LS Awards Committee is also asking us to send the winners as early as we can.

Again congratulations to all the nominees!

Ad Majorem dei Gloriam!

Jonathan Pua
External Vice President
Council of Organizations of the Ateneo

ika'y aking kaibigan

{here is a song that i love from the play "kaharian ng araw." i hope you'll like this one.}

Ika'y aking kaibigan
Ka'y raming pinagsamahan
Ngayon ako'y kailangan
Paano kita, iiwan

Anumang tarik ng bundok
Kasama mo ako sa taluktok
Kung rurok dagat ang siyang alok
Kasama mo akong aarok

Anumang lagim ng bangin
Anumang bangis ng hangin
Malalaglag man ang mga bituin
Makakaasa ka sa akin

urban trials

{this is a little tribute to our foster family and friends during our urban trials last november 2003}

loyola house community picture (jps)

coming out of the water

Homily
ACLC Retreat
23 October 2006

Good evening. Let me start my simple sharing with an image -- a fish coming out of the water. Just imagine, a photo, a painting, a captured movie frame, an image of a fish suspended some inches on air above the water. I invite you to take that image with you as we move along.

Studies show that no fish would just jump out of the water for no reasons at all. A fish would jump out of the water for the following reasons: 1. when a fish is in threat like it is being hunted down by its predator or fishermen; 2. when it is being startled or surprised; 3. during events of environmental hazards; and 4. a fish is simply a flying fish that is capable of getting out of the water from time to time. But there were very rare cases recorded that a fish would simply jump out of the water for no logical, rational, and perhaps, if a fish would have one, even psychological reasons. However, for the purpose of my sharing, the fish simply jump for a spiritual reason – just to be with God even just for a while.

My friends, I started out with this information because it speaks so much of what we are doing here right now. We are all coming out of the water. Coming to this retreat is coming out of the water. And I would like to believe our water is our home, our family and friends, our time doing the things we like to do leisurely, like watching movies, going to the beach, attending parties and gigs, playing bridge or basketball, and even perhaps just savoring that tasteful new cake of red ribbon. This is our water. And surely for most of us, leaving our water is not an easy thing to do. It takes much courage and love to do this.

The Gospel for today speaks the opposite of this love and courage. Our Gospel for today is about greed. Jesus said, “Take care to guard against all greed, for though one may be rich, one’s life does not consist of possessions.” Then Jesus narrates a parable about a rich man who invested and invested, rested, ate, drunk, and cheered, without realizing that he can’t bring all of these to heaven. The rich man didn’t value true wealth. The rich man then didn’t come out of his water.

My friends let us realize that when a fish comes out of the water, it can’t breath. It is a new world for the fish. It is like a desert where our water ends. Just like the fish, when we are in retreat, we can’t breathe the way we breathe when we are in our water. It is like a desert for us. As if we are not breathing for five full days. Yet when we stop breathing, when we are in our deserts, we are giving ourselves spaces, spaces to find that inner peace, hope, healing and perhaps truthful discernment and perspective of life.

As many of you are aware of, part of our Jesuit formation is to make the 30 day retreat. Thirty days of silence and prayer, which is the Spiritual Exercises. And part of that retreat was a prayer called, “Mediation of Hell.” We are to meditate the feeling of being in hell. And so our retreat director would ask us to choose a scary and difficult place for us to pray, to really experience hell. Perhaps, for most of us, hell is already being in a classroom. Yet some of my batchmates did this exercise in our cemetery in Sacred Heart at 12 o’clock midnight. Others did it at our piggery with all the dirt and stench. I did this exercise in our showers where it was once a morgue during World War II. The exercise made us feel spiritually poor and hopeless. The exercise choked us. But it was through this experience, this sense of being choked, that we were caressed by God’s loving embrace.

So friends, don’t worry too much. Be open to God’s love and grace during this retreat. And in His own time, he will reveal himself to you -- from the most profound and mysterious events in prayer, to the simplest and effortless routine that we do in this retreat. Just like when a fish jumps out of the water, it will eventually fall back again in the water. And always remember that you are not alone in this retreat. We too, as your Retreat Directors and Quarter Masters, we too jumped out of our water to stop breathing to be with you on your spiritual journey. So don’t worry too much. Just give yourself and it has its own rewards.

Let me end my sharing with a reflection about the fish the jumps out of the water. It is said that a fish that jumps out of the water with no reasons at all is a very rare case, one out of a billion, a phenomenon, a miracle. Again, studies show that 99% percent of these fishes or all of these fishes would never, ever jump again on its own without any valid reasons. Scientists consider this as one of natures’ mysteries. Nevertheless, I believe I know the answer. Perhaps, when such fish jumps and returns back to the water, when someone like you who will undergo spiritual solitude and silence for five long days, going back to the water, going back to your own world, with such longing and grace, things will never ever be the same again.

As we continue to give ourselves to the retreat, let us continually ask the Lord to keep that spirit always alive in our hearts – the spirit of being invited to come out of the water and to be with God even just for a while. Amen.

my homily for my sister's wedding

Do Whatever He Tells You
(A Wedding Homily for Chris and Cheng)

Before I begin I would like to thank Fr. Edwin for allowing me to give the homily for this matrimonial celebration. It is a rare opportunity to have the permission to give a homily in a wedding, so thank you very much, father.

It is only appropriate that for our gospel reading today, we have the story of a wedding party. Jesus and his friends are guests in the celebration, along with his mother Mary. But suddenly we’re told of a nightmare-come-true for every party host: They run out of drinks. So Mary, ever helpful, decides to come to the rescue. She goes to Jesus and presents the problem to her son. But what does Jesus say to her? Jesus said, “Woman, my hour has not yet come.” Not by any stretch of the imagination does that sound like a “Yes.” But what does Mary do? Instead of walking out of the party in a huff and going home to pout, she stays and instructs the waiters to “do whatever he tells [them].” Her wisdom and patience pay off: Like a good mother, she knows that her son won’t be able to resist helping those in need. We are told that Jesus eventually turns six stone jars of water into wine. Mary, and we imagine the parents of the groom and bride; all have a collective sigh of relief.

Today, as we gather here to witness the sacrament union of Chris and Cheng, we too cannot help but have a collective sigh. Finally, Chris and Cheng will tie the knot this afternoon!

Chris and Cheng first met in a YFC camp at the Spinola Retreat House in 1996. But it was hardly love at first sight. Right Chris? Right Cheng? Both were serving YFC as leaders and they work together to conduct YFC activities in the region. Chris sees Cheng as snobbish, and on the other hand Cheng sees Chris as goody-goody – or so they claim with each other. But as these things go, they met more often when both were studying in the Ateneo, working much closer in YFC, and they remained good friends because of all of these. After two years of discerning, Chris finally decided to make the first move. So the phone calls began. Letters were exchanged. Even oppositions from here and there. And the rest is history.

After ten months of waiting, they decided to go steady in 2000, and they’ve been together for the last six years – except for some complications at times, according to their best estimate, about five months and three days. In those six years, what started out as mere youthful friendship has evolved into something more mature, something stronger – thanks to the years and at times even the tears that both Chris and Cheng have shed in nourishing their relationship.

By this time I’m sure Chris and Cheng have had their share of disillusionments about each other. They certainly already know – all too well! – one another’s fault and frailties. Like for example, Chris often notice how Cheng would walk out on him when they have a fight. And it irritates Cheng how Chris takes much time to decide on things, even in just choosing on what food to order in the menu.

But here they are today before us. They come to this wedding, eyes wide open, in full knowledge and freedom. As they exchange their free consent in our ceremony, they know who each one is saying “I do” to, what each one is saying “Yes” to. When Chris tells Cheng that he takes her as his wife, Cheng responds likewise, well does each one know who and what it is that they are taking: the lovable part, but also the not-so-lovable part; the good and happy times but also the tough and sad times.

For as we all know, even in the best marriages, there comes the time when the honeymoon ends, when Chris and Cheng, like the couple at the weeding banquet in the Gospel, will also run out of wine and will only have water, at times even stale water. And even in the best of life, there come those times experienced by every married couple when even the water in the cup from which they drink becomes mingled with tears. When that time comes, Chris, Cheng, do not lose heart. Do not panic, do not pack up and leave. Let us learn from Mary, the mother of Jesus who in our gospel story suggests two very important things, which you may want to use as guidelines as you begin your new life together.

First, Chris and Cheng, wait. Wait as Mary waited even if at first Jesus did not seem inclined towards granting her requests. She waited and kept faith even when her prayer was apparently not going to be answered. You are called to do the same, to learn to be patient especially with one another, and especially when life grows bland or bitter. Be assured that in time – and only in time – God turns our stalest water into the sweetest wine.

Second, as Mary suggested, do whatever Christ tells you to. Love one another as Jesus asks you to love one another. In this day and age when love seems printed everywhere in all sorts of font types and sizes, when love is found on the lips of every other pop singer, it is good to be reminded of what love really means: an unconditional acceptance of, and commitment to, a person, including all his or her strengths and weaknesses. This is the love that you, Chris and Cheng, have been trained for the past six years, and are now called to live out for each other starting today. It is a love that, with Christ, can grow stronger through the years.

This is our prayer for you, Chris and Cheng, we, your family and friends, who love you both dearly: That after many many years, as you sit surrounded by the laughter of your children and grandchildren, you will finally understand that if we do what Christ tells us, He will truly save the best wine for last. Amen.

my baby pic

{here is my baby pic, i am around 1 or 2 years old here. this is me even now. my hair stands and this is the way i sleep. hehehe, just a realization. this is alo the new logo for my site.}

lagi magsuot ng malinis na salawal

Homilya
Kapilya ng JP
Ika-5 ng Disyembre 2006

Magandang umaga mga kapatid. Nais kong simulan ang aking homilya sa isang pagpapaliwanag sa librong nabasa ko na may pamagat na “Always Wear Clean Underwear.” Sa tagalog, “Lagi magsuot ng malinis na salawal.” (Ginawa ko lang yun para ma-impress kayo) Nakakatuwa itong libro na ito dahil ito ay mga listahan ng mga sinasabi ng ating mga magulang tulad nang, “Huwag umihi sa swimming pool,” o ”Kumain kayo ng gulay,” o “Tumingin muna sa kaliwa’t kanan bago tumawid sa kalsada.” At sa bawat naka-lista, meron mga dahilan na binibigay ng taga-akda kung bakit sinasabi ito ng atin mga magulang. Halimbawa sa “Huwag umihi sa swimming pool,” sinasabi nito ng atin mga magulang dahil para turuan tayo na huwag gumawa ng masamang gawain, kahit na walang tumitingin o walang makapag-huli sa atin.

Mga Kapatid nagsimula ako sa librong ito dahil ito ay angkop sa sinasabi ng Ebanghelyo. Sa Ebanghelyo natin ngayon sinabi ni Hesus, “Nagpupuri ako sa iyo, Ama, Panginoon ng langit at lupa, sapagkat inilihim mo ang mga bagay na ito sa mga pantas at sa matatalino, at ipinahayag sa maliit. Gayon nga, Ama Ko, ang ikasisiya ng iyong kalooban.” Dito sinasabi ni Hesus na masaya siya na makita ang mga karaniwang tao na naiintindihan at tinatangap ang Salita ng Diyos.

Ngunit meron pang sinasabi dito sa Ebanghelyo at ito ay ang epekto ng mapagkumbaba at ito ay ang espiritwal na pagkabata. May katumbas ito sa Mateo na sinasabi, “Katotohanang sinasabi ko sa inyo, malibang kayo’y magsipanumbalik, at maging tulad sa maliliit na bata, sa anumang paraan ay hindi kayo magsisipasok sa kaharian ng langit." Subalit sa pagka-alam natin na itong espiritwal na pagkabata ay hindi tungkol sa pagiging mahina, pagiging malambot, o pagiging mangmang. Ngunit pagiging bata dito ay tungkol sa pagtaboy ng atin sarili bilang mayabang at hustong tao. At sa ganitong paraan, mas nakikita natin ang atin sarili na hindi natin kaya gumawa ng ano man bagay ng atin sarili lamang.

Ngayon balikan natin ang librong tinutukoy ko kanina. Siguro para mas tugma sa buhay natin ngayon, palitan ko ang ”Kumain kayo ng gulay” sa “Kumain kayo ng isda.” Siguro kung sasabihin tayo nito ni Fr. Herb, hindi pa rin tayo susunod dahil karamihan sa atin ay ayaw kumain ng isda lalo na kung ito ay naka-lutong sabaw. Ngunit sa mga bata, kahit ayaw nila, kahit hindi nila ganap na maintindihan ang dahilan kung bakit kailangan nila kumain ng isda, gagawin at gagawin nila ang sinasabi ng kanilang magulang. Kaya masaya si Hesus sa Ebanghelyo. Masaya siya dahil kahit ang mga karaniwang na mga tao sa pagkakataon na iyon, tulad sa mga bata, naniwala at tinanggap ang mga Salita ng Diyos.

Mga kapatid ito siguro ang hamon natin bilang mga relihiyosa na araw-araw ay tinatanggap ang Salita ng Diyos tuwing misa. Sana, katulad ng mga bata, kahit tayo’y natatamad, kahit hindi natin naiintindihan ang mga pagbasa, tangapin pa rin ito at magtiwala. Tulad ng mga magulang sa librong binangit ko, meron itong dahilan, at ang Diyos Ama natin ay may dahilan sa mga utos niya sa atin. At syempre alalahanin rin natin na kailangan natin ng grasya at ang tulong ng Diyos Ama para hanapin ang tamang daan at manatili dito. Sa pagiging maliit na bata, kailangan magpabaya ng sarili tulad ng bata, magtiwala tulad ng bata, humingi tulad ng bata.

Sa panahon ng adbiento, sana lubos natin nagagalak na hintayin ang pagdating ni Hesus at tangapin at lubos magtiwala sa Salita ng Diyos. At syempre, “Huwag umihi sa swimming pool,” ”Kumain kayo ng isda,” at “Tumingin muna sa kaliwa’t kanan bago tumawid sa kalsada” dahil meron itong mga dahilan.

my birthday captured!

{here are some photos and stints of my birthday celebration, with jvp, my unit, and aclc, maraming salamat sa lahat!}

first star i see tonight

{for the next days, i will post my christmas entries during my juniorate. this one is my short story entry that won first place. hope you enjoy this}

First Star I See Tonight

In an open window of St. Francis Orphanage stands a little girl named Jenny. Almost every day, before the sun fully sets, she goes to this small window to wait for the first star to appear in the evening sky. Soft as a whisper, she recites a wish from her heart. “Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight, I wish I may, I wish I might, get the wish, I wish tonight.”

Nobody knows Jenny so as much as Norie, a social worker in the orphanage. It was one rainy night, twelve Christmases ago, when Norie heard a knock at the front door of the orphanage. She rushed to open the door and found no one, no one but a crying baby girl wrapped in bright colored linen, lying on their doorstep. Norie immediately took the baby in, changed her clothes, and fed her with warm milk. The baby’s cry subsided. Strangely, the baby’s bright eyes were fixed on Norie as if the baby had seen her before. From then on, Norie called her Jenny. As Jenny grew up, the two became the best of friends.

It is three days before Christmas and everybody in the orphanage wears a big joyous smile on his or her face. No corner of the house is without bright Christmas decorations, twinkling lights, the smell of unwrapped goodies, and the sound of merry cheers that go with all of these. Since the holiday started, the three storey orphanage is always cramped with different charitable groups who come yearly for a scheduled visit to the children. With their visit, they bring food, clothes, and Christmas presents creating for the children a little heaven in the small house. They talk to them, sing for them, and play with them. It is indeed the most wonderful time of year in the orphanage. Everybody is happy. Everybody but Jenny.

Every year, every Christmas, Jenny is this way. She goes out of her way to try to experience what Christmas is all about. She stuffs herself with all the yummy food she can eat until her tummy aches. She puts on all the clothes given to her until she is laughed at by the other children. She plays with all the toys until the thrill expires. Yet in the end, she still feels abandoned and confused. She often sits in one corner, quietly feeling the delight of her surroundings to unfold.

“Is this all that Christmas is about?” Jenny asks Ate Norie.

“Why do you ask?” Ate Norie politely retorts stooping down in front of Jenny.

“I eat all the food, I wear all the clothes, I play with all the toys…but I still can’t see what’s so special about Christmas.”

Ate Norie, with admirable patience, simply replies, “Christmas… Christmas is special not because of the gifts we receive, but because of the great love we feel in our heart during this season of giving and sharing.”

“But I still can’t see it?”

Ate Norie smiles. She holds Jenny’s hands. “You know what I usually do? I listen to my heart. It can see things beyond what our eyes can see.”

On the next day all the children, from five years old and above, are busy preparing for the most awaited day of the season – the Christmas adoption day. Each year, a family or a childless couple would pick an orphan to adopt and the child then spends Christmas day with them. It is a special treat for the children of St. Francis Orphanage. However, the painful reality is that not all the children are brought home for Christmas. Many are luckily picked but a few are helplessly left behind. Unfortunately, for years now, Jenny is one who hasn’t gone with a couple for Christmas. Even though she dresses herself beautifully, even though they say lovely things about her, even though she always presents herself with the cutest smile, the couples never pick her.

It is Christmas Eve tonight. The gate of the orphanage is opened as early as four o’clock in the afternoon. All eligible children are placed inside the T.V. room to watch endless Disney movies as they wait to be called. By late afternoon, most of the children have been picked and fetched by their adopted families. And there in her little corner Jenny, in her very best, patiently waits for someone to pick her. The afternoon sky starts to turn into a mellow, reddish portrait. It’s getting late. Nobody is arriving any more. She and a few others are the only ones still watching the movie.

Finally, the sound of the closing gate resounds. It is final. The rest of them won’t go to a family tonight. All of them are called back to the dining hall where the staff has prepared a grand noche buena and gifts for them. Jenny seems not to be interested. She goes upstairs to her window and recites her wish, as she usually does. Then a surprise. Someone is beside her.

“Who’s there?”

A familiar voice tickles Jenny’s heart. “Don’t be afraid, Jenny. It’s me.”

“Ate Norie! What are you doing here?”

“Well, I am going to take you home with me…tonight…and the rest of the nights. You don’t need to come to this window and make your wish ever again.”

“O, Ate Norie!” Jenny embraces Norie and bursts into tears.

“Why are you crying, Jenny?”

“Ate Norie, all I’ve ever wanted is to be able to see, so that I may see the world as you see it, with your own eyes. I wish I could see the goodies I eat, I wish I could see the clothes I wear, I wish I could see the toys I play with, and I wish I could see all of these…”

Silence fills the room. With her hand, Jenny is feeling her heart throbbing with much gladness. Jenny smiles. Then, in her blindness, she tries to feel Norie’s face with her hands.

“But most of all, I wish I could see you, the only mother I recognize. Star light, star bright, first star I see tonight, I thank you for the wish you granted me tonight.”

Arthur Nebrao, Jr., SJ
2 December 2004

salamat aclc

then i will buy you shoes like mine

{this is a homily i gave for aclc retreat last 2004. for the next week i will be giving again the same retreat for the third time and i would just like to share this to all of you.}

19 October 2004
Memorial of St. John Brebeuf, St. Isaac Jogues, martyrs and companions
Tuesday, 29th Week of Ordinary Time

Perhaps for some of us here, our brothers or sisters have already their own children; we already have nieces in our family. I have a niece and her name is Camille. I’d like to share with you a story involving my niece. It is a story I cannot forget.

I think that it is common for little girls to love playing “grown-up.” Perhaps, many of you have experience this when you were still a child. They put on their mother’s shoes, slinking their moms’ handbags around their arms. They sit in front of the dresser and put on their mothers’ make-up: lipstick and powder. Girls start to do these things even when they are only three or four years old.

My niece, Camille, was no exception. She loved wearing her mother’s shoes even if they were too big for her tiny feet. She would often ask my sister, “Mommy, when will you buy me shoes like yours?” My sister would always tell her, “You eat and you sleep so that you’ll grow up and your feet will become big. Then, I will buy you shoes like mine.” She got to be so persistent about this that she’d ask my sister day in and day out: “Mommy, when will you buy me those shoes?” My sister, with admirable maternal patience would always give the standard reply: “You eat and you sleep so that you’ll grow up and your feet will become big. Then, I will buy you shoes like mine.”

I would like you to call to mind this story each time you ask: Why does God take time in answering prayers? I say this because, probably, just like my niece, our feet are too small and our petitions are too big. And God would have to say, “You eat and you sleep so that your feet will grow big. When your feet are big enough, I will grant you the shoes you are asking for.” That is why God seems to delay. Not that God is a sadist. Not that God enjoys seeing us grovel. Not that God enjoys seeing us suffer. It is not because of all these that He has not given us our shoes. No. It is simply God’s way of encouraging us to eat and sleep and take care of ourselves. As it were, to grow and grow some more in His grace so that our hearts will grow big, big, big enough for all the love that He will give us.

My friends, I am telling you this simple story because there is a certain truth about prayer. Prayer is a mystery. Perhaps for some of us here, even at this midpoint of our retreat, we are still encountering difficulties in our prayer. Perhaps, it is still hard to find that inner silence. Perhaps, we are still clouded with distractions and expectations. Perhaps even, we are just starting to find that perfect spot to encounter our God. Why some good prayers are not answered?

Today, we celebrate the memorial of St. John Brebeuf, St. Isaac Jogues, and companions. They were French Jesuits who missioned for the native Hubron of North America. They were martyred by the tribes who believed in a different value. The stories of these martyrs are very rich, but what struck me was the prayer of St. Brebeuf. It is said, that even as a child, St. Brebeuf prayed to God that he would like to die as a martyr, he would like to die for the faith, he would like to die for Him. And his prayer was granted many years later, many years of difficulties, many years of graces, many years of consolations and desolations. And after all of these, I guess the feet of St. Brebeuf grew perfectly to fit with the shoes he was asking for.

The Lord tells us that all prayers are answered. Knock and it will be opened, seek and you will find. But we know from experience that not all prayers are answered. Whether we like it or not, some prayers are not answered, or better still, are not answered the way we like it. This then places us in a dilemma because God promises that all prayers will be answered and then somehow we experience that even good prayers don’t seem to be answered by God.

My friends let me share with you what my friend do when that occasion of difficulty and struggle occurs. When I pray, when I sacrifice and practically cry and kneel before God and ask Him to give me grace and blessing and grant my petitions and nothing happens, I look at the cross and ask the Father, “Why did you allow Your Son to suffer this way?”

It is a mystery that the Father allowed His only Begotten Son to suffer that way. It is also a mystery why some of our prayers are not answered by God the way we expect them to be answered. There will always be mysteries in life. If you can understand why the Father allowed His Son to die on the cross perhaps you will be able to understand why some good prayers are not answered.

God wants to answer our prayers. Unfortunately, in the story of Camille, our feet are still too small for the big shoes He has in store for us.

As we continue to enter deeper into this retreat, let us continually ask the Lord to keep that spirit always alive in our hearts. “You eat and you sleep so that your feet will grow big. When your feet are big enough, I will grant you the shoes you are asking for.”

St. John Brebeuf, St. Isaac Jogues, and companions, pray for us.

Arthur W. Nebrao, Jr., S.J.